Crisis of Souls
by theunknownvoice
Summary: She knew he was dangerous from the beginning. She knew what he was capable of but she never expected him to kiss her. Jason ToddRaven
1. A Dangerous Relationship

Crisis of Souls

By: theunknownvoice

Chapter 1: A Dangerous Relationship

Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters are the property of DC Comics.

She had known he had been in the tower. She had felt his presence even in her drug induced state.

She shouldn't have known why he had come back. Tim's bloodied body was a testimony to his anger. It was the blood on the walls that disturbed her more than Tim's condition.

He had written in his own blood those fateful words: _Jason Todd was here._

His anger and aggression did not surprise her. His desire to exact revenge and to test Tim not surprising either. She knew what he was capable of and that his inner demons were as tormenting as her own.

She could not help Jason. She could not help her friend. Perhaps later when the turmoil of the Crisis ended she would go see him.

A Month Later

The funeral for Superboy was enough to grate on Raven's frazzled nerves. She didn't want to hear one more time about how he was at peace. She was tired of the feelings of sorrow, grief and anger that surrounded her. Her mind screamed for relief.

In desperation she fled the memorial service. She glided towards the graveyard in Gotham. She had often come here after they had buried him. The lone solitary grave had been a place for her to rest and regain herself. A place for her to remember her hot-headed friend.

The cemetery in Gotham never had too many visitors especially not at this late hour of the night. She felt his presence behind her instantly. He was angry and full of hatred, bitter and enraged. The desire for vengeance and love consumed him warping his reality.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded.

"I didn't want to sit through Superboy's funeral. I have already buried too many friends to want to burry more," she whispered.

They were both broken. They were both lost in the swirl of right and wrong. They were imperfect creatures that populated an imperfect world.

She had been born damned. Her fate was to destroy the world, the universe, and create a hell on earth.

He had been born to be abandoned, shunned, and unloved. The streets had been his playground and his childhood virtually nonexistent.

They had both died and came back to a world that had gone on without them. It had been as if their presence wasn't missed. They were two ghosts traveling through the world of the living.

She could not forget the terrors of her father. She could not forgive that monster for the destruction he had caused and the damage to her soul he had inflicted.

He could not forsake the memory of the bullet entering his body. It had been a coldly calculated murder. He could not forgive the father who did not avenge him or the murderer who laughed as he lay bleeding to death on the ground.

"Jason, why are you avoiding me?" she asked breaking the silence.

"I'm not avoiding you. I just prefer to be alone," he answered.

She stared at the grave.

"I miss him," she said pointing to the tombstone. "I miss how he was reckless and angry. I miss how he thought he could change the world. He lived through a hell that no child should be forced to endure but he survived. He had his scars but he wasn't completely broken."

"I'm not that boy anymore. I've learned that the world is cruel and unrelenting. You can't change it by putting the criminals behind bars. You have to put them to death in order that they never kill, rape, or molest another person again."

"When it's all said and done what happens to you? You've made yourself a killer. When you finally kill the Joker, what then? Who gave you the right to deal out death and justice? What will become of you when you're death is avenged?"

"I'll go back into the shadows. I'll fade away just like everyone wanted me to."

"I don't want that for you," she whispered.

"It doesn't matter what you want," he said.

Three Years Later

She was training. It was the most exhausting thing that she had ever been through. Whoever had allowed Cyborg to design an obstacle course was nuts. She paused for a second and looked towards the dark far right corner of the room.

"I know you're there Jason," she said.

"I can't fool you anymore," he said coming from the shadows.

"The others aren't here," she replied as she went through the course.

"I came to see you. I know you've keeping our meetings a secret Rachel.

She winced slightly at her alternative name.

"I'm making a life for myself. Besides why should the others care if I'm seeing you? We're just friends."

"If we're just friends then why did Gar think you were seeing another man?"

She felt like she had been slapped.

"Admit it Raven, you are as broken as I am," he said smirking.

"I'm not like you, Jason," she said calmly. "I haven't cut off all of my emotions and become a killer."

"I can still feel," he replied.

He moved closer and kissed her harshly. She fought him but responded in the end to his touch.

"You'll see Raven. Yes, we're friends but we're also something more."

"What do you want from me?"

"Nothing. Let's just keep this our little secret," he said as he retreated into the shadows.

She fingers traced her lips. What had she gotten herself into?

The End


	2. Past Bled Red

Chapter 2: Past bled Red

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: I can't get this idea out of my head. So I decided to continue writing. This is all in flashback explaining how Raven and Jason got so close.

Three-years ago

"It's been a long time," Raven said in her classic monotone.

"I could say the same," replied figure in the shadows.

"Care to explain why you decided to do this?"

"I guess the phrase 'I missed you' doesn't qualify as an answer."

"Spill you're guts Hood. I don't have times for games."

"I love pissing off Dick. I enjoyed beating the crap out of the rookie. Why should I stop now that I can clean the streets of Gotham?"

"Even if that means murder?"

"If the end justifies the means why should I care?"

Raven rolled her eyes. He was still the same cocky boy he had always been. He was a sixteen year old trapped in the body of a nineteen year old.

"I guess death didn't make you any less angry," she replied almost bored.

He grinned behind the helmet. He knew his words had rattled her. Ever since that day in the graveyard he had known she would come looking for him. She would not try to save him. The thing was he didn't want to be saved.

"It's a pathetic that you have nothing better to do," she said.

"What's pathetic that I was that easy to replace. All you had to do was put a kid in a suit and he's the new Robin. Screw the one in the ground," he said his voice raising by the word.

"I don't have anything to do with Tim becoming Robin."

"I forget you were in the grave too. Seems like no one cared that either one of us was dead."

"Why did you let Tim live? You don't have a problem killing people. It could've been so easy for you to kill Tim," Raven asked her amethyst eyes flashing.

"Would you rather I killed him Rae? I would be happy to oblige that," Jason sneered coming out of the shadows.

He tossed the helmet down on the ground. His eyes clad by the familiar red mask.

"Maybe I will give you another friend to bury in the ground."

She slapped him hard across the cheek. She raised her hand again but he grabbed her.

"You're not angry with me Rachel. You and I both know it," he said before going back into the shadows.

It became some game between them. They met up several times.

Raven had been drifting from the Titans. Her relationship with Gar becoming a disaster and talking to Jason was somewhat refreshing. She was trying to help him but she knew that he was manipulative.

Jason was lost in his life. He was angry and he viewed himself justified for that anger. He was devoted to bringing down the Gotham crime world. Raven was a faint connection from his old life. She didn't lecture him the way Dick and the others did.

"Where were you?" Gar shouted.

"I was training," Raven answered coolly.

Their relationship was on the rapid route of disintegration. Gar was stressed being the team leader. He was having a hard time and she was tired of being his hold on sanity.

"Is there someone else?"

"What are you talking about?" she asked.

"Are you seeing someone else?" he demanded.

"Why would you think?" she asked.

"You are distant with me and then there's the weird phone calls."

"Weird phone calls?" she asked her eyes lit.

"Someone hangs up whenever I pick up your phone. Who the hell is calling you?"

Raven didn't answer.

Present-day

Her fingers traced over her lips. What would she do now? She couldn't tell the others but she needed to talk to someone about Jason. She was afraid for him and herself.

"Raven, are you alright?" Gar asked.

She was dazed walking around the common room.

Her mind battled over the choices. She needed to talk to someone but Gar wasn't the right person. The other titans stared at her as she sat down her eyes dangerously quivering.

Gently Donna hug her hugged her shoulders.

"You know you can talk to us about anything?" Kori asked.

Raven moved towards Dick's room. Even though he wasn't in the Titans Dick and the other original Titans had a room saved for them.

Nightwing lay sprawled out over his bed.

"What's up Rae?" he asked.

"We need to talk about Jason," she said shutting the door.

To be continued….


	3. Cursed Soul and All

Chapter 3: Cursed Soul and All

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Gotham was the city of ghosts. It was the city of shadows and the birthplace of the Red Hood.

It was a normal night. The wind was blowing a steady beat as he watched across the street. He had been battling the criminal underworld for some time. He was used to waiting, used to being a faint shadow in the darkness.

Patience was the only thing death had managed to teach him.

He felt a small satisfaction at what he had done when he last visited Titans Tower. Her eyes had been filled with surprise at his action. Her words may have been from shock but her body—he smirked again as he watched the meeting.

The Black Mask was long dead but these new crime lord wantabees pissed Jason off. These idiots knew they were in his turf. They knew that the Red Hood wasn't known for being lenient. They knew all of the facts but they still thought they could pull a fast one on him.

He had his own plans for these fools. He preferred a simple bullet to the head. It would make his life easier and teach the next set to be smarter. Jason liked challenges.

Six Years Ago

He hated it. Hated being told what to do. He hated the looks both Bruce and Alfred would give him. He knew what they thought. He knew what Dick thought.

His so-called brother had given him another lecture. Dick was never the screw-up. He was never the bad son. Dick was the perfect one. Dick was the original. It was this never ending shadow that Jason would never step out of.

But Jason knew he was better than Dick. He was better than Bruce. He was better than those pathetic Teen Titans. He was better than all of them and he would prove it.

"_Your anger is going to be your undoing. You are going get yourself killed with your reckless behavior."_

Raven's words echoed in his mind. What did she know? What made her so special that she could pass condemnation on his life?

Jason watched as the sun went down. He donned his uniform without a word. Nothing was said as Robin went out for the last time. After all aren't sixteen year old boys supposed to be invincible?

Four Years Ago

He knew now what had happened to him. He knew every horrifying detail. The psychopathic clown had killed him and his _father_ had just sent his killer back to prison with a slap on the wrist.

He was he not worth vengeance? Was his life meaningless? He didn't care now. He would deal with the clown himself.

He would deal with the usurper too. He would punish Dick and Bruce for forgetting him. His own father and brother had let his killer go.

Talia had told him the truth. She had saved him by shoving into the Lazarus pit. His brain damage had been reversed. His memories restored. His instincts had been sharpened and his desire for vengeance had intensified.

He had understood the power of murder at sixteen. Batman would not kill. The Joker and the others knew that. Batman would fight them and bring them to justice but he would not kill. But death and the possibility of death made people reconsider their crimes. It stopped many and persuaded few.

His eyes glanced at the newspaper clipping: _Red Hood Crime Spree Continues._ Jason Todd smiled. The answer was right there.

Three Years Ago

He had enjoyed his debut. He had enjoyed fighting the others. He had tormented Bruce with his death.

"_You let me die! And then you let my killer go!"_

He had fought with Dick the red helmet hiding his face.

"_I got what I came for. A lay of the land."_

Now all that was left was the precious little Robin, Tim.

The fight was everything. It has a beating that was filled with rage. A beating that he felt Tim earned. Tim had taken his place in the family. Tim was his replacement.

He could have killed his _little brother_ right then and there but he didn't. Somewhere in the back on his mind he realized the truth. Tim was like him.

He knew about Tim. He knew about the death of Tim's girlfriend, and the loss of Tim's father. But it wasn't tragedy that made Jason spare Tim.

It was the fact that Tim had shear guts. Even bleeding and broken he had said he was the best. Even when a simple no would have ceased Jason's beating Tim refused to cave.

_I like you little brother. I like you a lot. You have guts. More guts than the old man or Dickie._

So he had let Tim live.

That night at Titans Tower something else had happened to Jason. He had been in her room. He didn't need Raven to wake up and stop him. He didn't need her interference.

Still the feelings he had felt were so strange. She was…beautiful. He had stared at her for a few moments after drugging her. She was so beautiful and he couldn't help himself. It was the first time that he had ever wished someone a good dream.

He felt mercy for her while he attacked the others. He did everything to prevent them from helping Tim. He even caused them bodily harm but he couldn't hurt her. He couldn't bring himself to cause her pain because she was Raven and she knew what he was.

Present-Day

He watched his eyes following these criminals. He smirked as he went across the street. Gotham's crime would be eradicated. He would make sure of it. He would finish what he started here.

He pulled out the device carefully and with the push of the button the building blew sky high. Don't you just love C-4?

He moved quickly across the night back to his apartment. It was dirty, practically a hole in the ground. He touched his throat there was thin scar from when Bruce cut him the batarang. He remembered thinking he would die again. He would die like he had lived—alone.

He removed the mask and costume quickly and lay down. He wanted to sleep but he couldn't. The nightmares would come back. The nightmares of the death the Joker had given him. Nightmares of being trapped in the coffin clawing himself out with just his belt buckle and bloody fingers. Nightmares of being brain dead unable to communicate. Nightmares of the batarang slicing his throat and Bruce screaming his name. Nightmares of him beating the tar out of Dick and Tim.

He thought of Raven. Did she know that he loved her? Did she know that she was the only thing keeping him from going back to the shadows? He stilled because of her simple words.

"_I don't want that for you."_

He turned away.

Ra's al Ghul's words floated back to him, "A deceitful child has spurned her father and cursed your soul!"

Why would Raven ever feel anything for such a creature? Especially a creature whose soul bared not only the sin of countless murders but the taint of the Lazarus pit?

No, he was good enough for her. Even after three years of knowing what he was doing she never turned him in. She never brought him to justice or told the others. Did she love him?

_Since when do I care what anyone thinks?_ he demanded.

But the fact he remained he wanted her to love him, cursed soul and all.

To be continued….


	4. Repairing Souls

Chapter 4: Repairing Souls

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Sorry for such a late update. There's been several technical difficulties involving my last computer.

Dick Grayson never admitted to understanding Jason Todd. He couldn't admit that he could see that darkness. Dick had almost fallen into the path of the desperate vigilante willing to do anything to bring justice.

Dick had almost become the very element he fought against. He had almost become a killer. But Dick Grayson wasn't a killer and he would never be a killer. The instinct to kill and the rejection of Bruce's flawed morality had never consumed Dick. No, Dick Grayson was not Jason Todd.

Raven listened to Dick as he recounted Jason's actions. Jason had killed and he had done it with a smirk on his face. Jason had given Dick information and had protected his brother. Back and forth it went with the image of Jason alternating from corrupt vigilante to loyal brother/ally.

And no matter what Dick said Raven found her mind disturbingly made up. It was as if her choice had been long before this night. As if she had made it the minute he had wandered back into her life.

-

It took a grand total of three weeks for Jason to approach the tower. It wasn't that he was afraid. Jason Todd was never afraid. Fear was for people like Timmy.

It was just that he was busy. The last group of rogue assassins had almost got away. He had done it as a favor to Cass. The girl reminded him a lot himself and he didn't know why she had crawled back to the family after her little incident with Slade.

She should've just recognized their rejection and left. It wasn't worth it trying to prove to Bruce that you were on the "good side." With Bruce it was always once a sinner always a sinner.

Jason wasn't going to come crawling back. He would help Bruce if necessary. His father, however, had better get a grip. Jason wasn't going to be the good little boy. That was Dick's job. He wasn't going to be the future Batman. That was Timothy's fate. Jason was the black sheep and he didn't give a damn if Bruce wanted him to play Saint Jason or prodigal son. If someone ever tried to put him in the grave again he was going to do them the favor of showing up at their funeral.

For family Jason would stick out his neck and as far as Jason was concerned Cassie was family even if she was a bat and dating the imposter.

Jason had the blessing of helping out the Imposter and Cassie nail the last two assassins. Tim wanted to take the guys into the police. Jason wanted to kill them. Cassie prevented the bloodshed by knocking out the two brothers and dragging the assassins to the meetinghouse of a gang they had betrayed.

Jason had to agree little Cassie was his type of woman. At least she wasn't as delusional as Timmy, Dickie and dear old Dad. She knew the score.

Jason smirked. Knowing the score was everything.

-

He hadn't expected her to be waiting for him. In fact he had expected Raven to slug him in the face for the kiss. Not he would've minded fighting with Raven. She was hot when she had a pissed off expression on her face.

Raven didn't say anything when she saw him on the rooftop. She just grabbed his hand and dragged him through the tower. The others were frozen still as Raven pulled Red Hood through the building towards her bedroom.

"She must need him for something," Kory said attempting to rationalize the scene before them.

Raven who was about five foot two was dragging a six foot tall Jason through the building. He obviously didn't know what the hell was going on and wasn't resisting partially because the entire thing entertained him. Raven didn't even notice the Titans staring but remained focused on her goal: get Jason to her room.

"Or he's the guy she cheated with," Gar said darkly as Raven slammed her bedroom door.

The others turned to look at him.

_You two are too different to work out. Them, however…._Jericho signed, _they understand each other._

"I understood her, Joey. I loved her and she left me and decides to take up with a lunatic. What the hell does she want from him?" Gar demanded.

"Maybe it's because they both know what it's like," Ravager said plainly.

"What, what, is like?" demanded Robin.

"To have their souls in crisis."

-

Raven didn't care what the others thought. She had made up her mind about this meeting. The last meeting was on Jason's terms this one would be on hers.

She removed the dark blue hood easily letting her whole face be visible. She was expressionless as she gazed over him. His emotions were in turmoil but that was typical Jason. He was like arsenic, fast acting and extremely deadly. She could feel so many conflicting things in him.

There was supision. Had she trapped him? There was anger. The anger was more directed at Bruce than at her. There was loneliness. He hated that his former friends were staring at him like he was some type of criminal. She had expected these because with Jason they were always present. However, the waves of love and desire he was projecting were unnerving.

He wanted her. His mind screamed like a teenager boy's that he was in her bedroom alone with her. He could picture doing several things that—Raven didn't know she could have that effect on a person. Then there was love.

It was twisted but Jason did love her. It wasn't pure or innocent. Instead it was a heady mixture of lust, desire, friendship and love that was intoxicating. It was something that she had only felt from Jason and so unique that she would remember its emotional imprint long after this encounter.

She could see his soul with its bloody wounds and long jagged scars. There was darkness and light in him and the entities battle constantly. Both wanted possession of this soul but neither had it. He wasn't a pure being but he wasn't a fallen one either.

For once Raven let her emotions do the work. She didn't try to control herself as her hands reached up at their own accord to grasp the red hood. She had always hated the helmet. It was good at hiding everything but she wanted to see his face. How had his face changed since he was the boy in the green shorts?

That boy had had laugher on his face. It wasn't that she hadn't seen his face before. She had but she had never examined it. She had never imprinted him into her memory because Jason was like fire to her. She could remember his destructive power and light but she didn't remember the flames. To look at the flames for too long is to be hypnotized by them. Now she wanted to see the face and the features especially the eyes. Eyes that she had never seen.

Of course under his helmet he wore that thin red mask. Even then she wanted to see more. Never once in all the years they had spent meeting had she dared to touch him. Never once had she ever dared to rip off a person's mask.

Her hands dipped underneath the domino mask and stoked the soft skin around his eyes. Her other hand caressed his face feeling the stubble on his chin and the smooth skin of a boy on his checks. She pulled softly as the fabric came undone and she could see what was Jason Todd.

He hadn't stopped her and he didn't know why. When he had felt her fingers touch the skin around his eyes he had immediately wanted to gab her hand but he hadn't. He didn't even move a muscle to stop her from doing it.

He trusted her. He had never trusted anyone since his death. Trust had allowed his mother the opportunity to betray him. His trust for Bruce had made him Robin. Trust had died with him as he was getting beaten with a crowbar. Trust had died in that explosion along with his bitch of a mother.

Yet here he was allowing his Raven to see his naked face.

She watched him closing analyzing what was in front of her. She had made her decision and his eyes only enforced. Those blue eyes, a mixture of rage and passion, were enough to let her know that she had made the right choice.

She moved closer until she was right in his line of view.

"I love you, Jason."

It was barely whisper but it was enough.

-

There was darkness in them both. Raven battled hers daily not letting it consume her. Jason allowed its taint but guarded sections of his soul from it.

No one understood how they could love each other and be on such different sides. Jason still killed when he thought it necessary. Raven still fought with non-lethal means. Neither tried to convert the other to their method for fear of causing irreversible damage.

Shattered souls began to be pieced back together. It was a slow process but together they did it.

-

Raven stretched lazily. Her body was stiff from last night. The Titans battle with the new Brother Blood was enough to make her ache for days. She was getting really tired of all these Brother Bloods and their sons. Honestly, when would people in that family learn?

She glanced over her shoulder to see the still sleeping male. She smiled softly before kissing the nape of Jason's neck. She would keep him for as long as she could. In sleep he pulled her towards him and let her lay on his chest. Slowly she closed her eyes.

As long as he was here her soul was repaired, its missing pieces well in place.

The End


End file.
